No coffee, no beer- no more late nights and false idols.
No love, no sex & No family.
No more using my hand for release. No relief
No pain, no regrets, but that’s a lie.
No more lying to myself.
Grease fires and pistol whipped, so sorry that I can’t take it with me.
I put faith in people and things
but they just let me down, and I let me down and now you look at me to share truth.
No more strip clubs, falling off stools- and throwing money at satin skin and broken homes
A life I could never possibly know.
Drown out the hollers for more- we forgive them
And can’t look at ourselves.
No more sleepless nights- you can’t tell them apart
The days bleed out, insomniac, double back & sewage
where the flies circle and circulate
no amount of liquid poured into your stomach allows you to forgive yourself.
No thoughts of death, no more Big Macs,
Pull the stopper on the tub
No more delusions or illusions
No pills for deafening the pain
No allusions that there’s any other way.
No forgiveness, just aftermath