Run

Slow burn, the death of presence,

Fearful of moments that don’t exist yet.

Chatter and noise,

Father burying his daughters in oil.

Clog the courts for years.

Sheltered pets, homeless vets—who are the real animals here?

 

Crowd goes wild, watching the so-called famous fall to the side.

Easier to pretend, pretend to leave

A lover you couldn’t save,

Won’t let you forget why you came.

Run for your life, or stay and watch it all fade.

Tearful, afraid.

Scared.

Let me run away with you…

You’ll never know how much I cared.

Freefall

Maybe you boys will finally get the daddy you need,
cause there’s nothing left in me.
You pointed your finger, fired a shot,
I pretended to die
played dead,
stuck my head in the clouds one last time.

You can’t spend your life
floating in the sky.

Falling away, from both of you.
He’ll take care, be what you need.
There’s nothing left of me.

Illusions

It’s not as strange as you think, but still I keep you guessing. Is this piece a missing link, or a lie we hold too tightly?

Bitter pills line the sink, and the real ones that keep my safe. All this left me on the brink, of someone who kept on fighting

I’m losing you. I’m losing you.

So my mind isn’t here, still I see daylight when night draws near. The chaos I feel, will soon be subsiding.

For whatever it’s worth. I will always hold you dear. Until you value more, than just a part in the scenery.

I’m losing you, I’m losing you.  (Selfishly)

Eluded to you, elusive to me, all these illusion of who I am and who you’ll never see

The weight of the sky, seems so very light, and I’m done playing pretend for the rest of my life

But I keep on trying to be… so much more  than I am, til nothing exists

Another day of the same, but I feel like the taste has gone away, if you’re looking for words to say, pick ones that are worth denying…

I‘m losing you, I’m losing you

What the Curtain Hides

I want you to save me. Gone for a moment, to live in eternity. Looking-glass-self. Become someone else.

Strange to see you here now. Wayward travelers spanning lost freedoms, now one with the world. Closing in.

Small enough to see the end.

Comparing how I felt. All of those precious moments competing at once. For a single moment.

You’ll forget me when I leave this place.

This curtain hides me well, drapes around my wrists, where they once became fists. Tired of the relentless beating of my own defects. Much softer around my neck.

Hidden until eternity comes.

 

 

 

Victim Statement Editorial

Lay down, the past, underneath,
a crumbled blanket to sleep,
the sidewalk,
you pass quickly on the skyline,
things look better from a distance.
I’m on the other side, a hapless byline
in a ‘choose your own adventure’ book.
I’m watching you drift by-
no more “hello’s”,
niceties falling short, failing us,
the plight of children caught between.
They’ll be ok, kids always are, resilient, tactile,
raw emotions blanked out by playgrounds and Fruit Loops.

Somebody saw me in a crowd, alone,
Nothing even worthwhile
toddlers crowding the stage, lights and heat,
the burgeoning distance where no one can see
-a situation where every instinct let me down.
This auditorium couldn’t hold all my angst.
Angst. Just another word that = I feel sorry for myself.
How I disappointed, but never my intention.
My face blank, I see you and your paternal crutch
and mine, nowhere near here.

Thank god, at least I have a chance now.
I see your face, or faces, dependent on which mood,
weighed in, quality over quantity I guess.

Just stop glaring at me for once.
This isn’t a party for me either.
Despite how your mind grasps at straws
your painted fingernails chipped, resembling claws
and an array of scars
ripple across what’s left of my heart.
We have plenty of baggage for another trip,
let’s empty the contents into someone else’s life.

We’ll never be the same, I’m over here and you’re there
and it was never how it started, but where we left off.
This auditorium, filled with strangers,
filled with people, maybe I said “hi” to them once,
in an effort to relate.
But that’s a poor excuse
and not worth the wait.
Spanning 41 years, awkward smiles, and tears
just in private though.
I’d hate for you to see me as I am.

Troll along, who cares where you go-
the box will keep you neatly in bounds.
People Magazine, Starbucks and cashed in 401k’s.
Looks like a prison from here.
How did it end this way??
I remember.
I just got up and left.

…and me
somewhere in the back aisle,
wishing the whole place was gone.
or is it already ?
The emergency exit within a few sprints to the sidewalk.
Running away, running for my life
or just looking for the next victim.

Glamorous

This storybook romance, as a kid who knew little.
A godless world of men/children and seekers of caves to hide,
cavemen, with little room for women inside
purchased on credit, a debt owed for no repentance
Prostitutes or strippers,
no discerning between the two,
sorry lives that hold only resentment.
Cash sale, and how did it fail,
who takes the blame for this execution?
If you only could stay, pardon the world for screwing you this way.
The mirror image, now growing old, way too tired to play along
your mind wanting to forget today
You can’t remember when you came alive
Only to be pronounced dead after such a short time.

Pictures torn from your past, the recluse, the lost years
singe hair and skin, old age spots… the sun no longer your friend