I still remember the day you were born,
the days before and the last moments we had. You’re gone.
They forgot what its like.
Or never knew.
None of their children sacraficed for the greater good.
We see every dollar slipping in your pockets made fat,
disregarding every soul that ever fought back.
Old men, death of just another child.
Congregating around the longest mile.
They don’t know what it’s like.
They’re not the last young minds to be crushed under foot,
bought and sold-out, stale amendments of truth.
Their inaliable right, in the face of those who lied,
trampling all those who stood up for those who died.
You’ll never know what it’s like.
I hope you don’t.
17 more lives, gone before their time.
Your sweet daughter struck down by nine bullets fired.
So many parents trapped amidst a torrent of sleepless nights.
One voice united to rise, from millions of restless minds.
Reborn to defy and fight for their lives.
Calling out and you’re not there.
We had all we wanted but I couldn’t see.
I live in half-truths, spent time from wasted youth,
or one last time to be next to you.
To feel your calm. To feel your unrest.
Can you see it for what it is? Circling, circling…only to find dead ends.
With your tongue in cheek, you can’t speak, but you know it’s already been said.
No one sees you for who you are. Circling the stars…
I see your heart pulling away, or is it mine, it’s all the same.
The paint on a log, the multicolored rain. Or is this colorblind for me to find my way?
What was good for you, not ok for me too. Let this moment open a gateway to this half of a heart for me to break.
We are all habits to reclaim.
This hopeful scene plastered in a daydream, the truth, sordid and grey.
Sentiments of fallen ideals, less than real, manufactured in some false display- for you to reclaim.
All those concede, parts of you I didn’t want to see, not in line with my own faults
And the words we had shared, not past lives to bare- believe these moments as truth.
This mind is relentless, searching for heartache and sorrow well spent.
real people matter, feelings we all break.
Because birth to death is not easily explained
No more worry to project.
The morning grey turned blue
and I knew
the sky no longer was falling.
Just five minutes alone, that’s all I’ll need.
Alone in silence, never truly alone at all.
I’m here with you,
sun through the curtains
the pale white of morning
So happy to just be.
Places people and things
Don’t mean anything
if you allow it all back in
whenever it can
Talking with no walking,
Words and lip service and derailed again
My mind a sieve, walked on by myself, makes no sense
Somehow I thought I had this licked
Still the pariah, with the wounds and pricks
The past careening into my neck
At break neck speed snapped me back into my seat
Flung me out in the street
Roadkill and rubber neck
Trampled under foot from all those who wished me dead
It was a bitter pill to choke down
I wish there was more of a warning this time
I relied on you and I don’t know why?
All this love to give, my expectation that you would just bandage me up.
Band aids on a twelve inch cut,
Bled out, strip search
And I’d say something like “this will be the last time”,
but I’ve learned enough
call my own bullshit and let the past creep
to take over